I’m happy to admit that I find it very difficult leaving Harry. I’ve got used to going to work, largely because I’ve managed to establish a routine that allows me to feed Harry his breakfast before I go, then bath him and put him to bed when I return home.
I also make an exception when it comes to Harry spending the odd night at his grandparents – it gives Melissa and I the chance to relax, not to mention the chance to have a bit of a lie-in. Even then, we’re always in a hurry to pick him up the following morning.
However, I spent last weekend on a stag night in Poland and it brought home to me just how precious my weekends are when it comes to spending time with Harry.
As best man, I simply had to go, and I’m not going to pretend I didn’t enjoy the chance to have a few beers and a catch up with my friends; after all, since Harry arrived, it’s not been a regular occurrence.
But I do look forward to my weekends enormously because I get to spend so much time with Harry. Melissa likes to hand responsibility for him over to me, and I can spend all day running round after him. What made it worse was on this occasion was the fact that Harry had been poorly last week, suffering from a bout of tonsillitis.
So you can imagine my horror when we arrived at Krakow Airport on Sunday morning, only to find that Liverpool Airport was closed. Initially we were told there would be no flights to Liverpool for a few days and the prospects for the rest of the UK were looking bleak. The thought of being away from Harry for a few more days was heartbreaking.
Eventually, we managed to find four seats on a flight to Bristol. My friends immediately said that I should have one of them, as I needed to get back to Harry. I was extremely relieved and grabbed the chance to get home with both hands. I did feel a bit guilty about leaving the others behind, though, particularly when I found out they weren’t going to get back until Tuesday.
We finally made it home just before midnight on Sunday, much to my relief. Of course, Harry was fast asleep, and it took a fair amount of self control not to pick him up and give him a cuddle. When I heard him crying in the night, though, I was in his room like a flash.
He seemed very pleased to see me when he woke the following morning and I was over the moon when he pointed at me and said ‘da da’. Let’s just say I’m looking forward to this weekend.
Wednesday 26 May 2010
Friday 14 May 2010
Tantrums and challenges
As I’ve said several times in this column, being a dad is a wonderful and incredibly rewarding experience.
With Harry now 15 months old, however, I’m starting to understand one of the major challenges of parenthood – dealing with tantrums.
This is Harry’s latest discovery. If he doesn’t get his own way, he collapses in a heap on the floor and screams.
Unfortunately this can happen at any time – and Harry isn’t fussy about where he chooses to have his tantrums. We’ve had them in supermarkets, in the street, in cafes, and so on. I’ll admit it can be quite embarrassing, and you always get the odd person looking at you as if to say ‘how could be so cruel to that little boy’.
The first time it happened, I was so surprised I didn’t quite know how to react. It was a textbook tantrum – lying down on the floor and shouting at the top of his voice. In fact, it was so unexpected, I almost laughed.
At the moment, the slightest setback can trigger one. At home, we’ve got safety blanks covering all of our plug sockets, which is just as well because one of Harry’s favourite pastimes is flicking the switches. Of course, it’s my job to keep him away from the plugs and, guess what, this results in tantrums galore.
It’s incredible how quickly these tantrums blow over, though. Within seconds of crying his heart out, he will be back on his feet again laughing. Harry clearly knows what he’s doing.
Melissa says it’s just a phase and, as she points out, we’ll soon be able to communicate with him better. By this, I take it she means we’ll soon be able to start bribing him which, if I remember my childhood correctly, is just about the most effective way of ensuring good behaviour.
He is now saying a few more words and clearly understands more and more when we talk to him.
The best bit about this is opening the door when I get home from work, and hearing him shout ‘dad, dad, dad’. It’s a magical feeling and reminds me just how lucky I am.
With Harry now 15 months old, however, I’m starting to understand one of the major challenges of parenthood – dealing with tantrums.
This is Harry’s latest discovery. If he doesn’t get his own way, he collapses in a heap on the floor and screams.
Unfortunately this can happen at any time – and Harry isn’t fussy about where he chooses to have his tantrums. We’ve had them in supermarkets, in the street, in cafes, and so on. I’ll admit it can be quite embarrassing, and you always get the odd person looking at you as if to say ‘how could be so cruel to that little boy’.
The first time it happened, I was so surprised I didn’t quite know how to react. It was a textbook tantrum – lying down on the floor and shouting at the top of his voice. In fact, it was so unexpected, I almost laughed.
At the moment, the slightest setback can trigger one. At home, we’ve got safety blanks covering all of our plug sockets, which is just as well because one of Harry’s favourite pastimes is flicking the switches. Of course, it’s my job to keep him away from the plugs and, guess what, this results in tantrums galore.
It’s incredible how quickly these tantrums blow over, though. Within seconds of crying his heart out, he will be back on his feet again laughing. Harry clearly knows what he’s doing.
Melissa says it’s just a phase and, as she points out, we’ll soon be able to communicate with him better. By this, I take it she means we’ll soon be able to start bribing him which, if I remember my childhood correctly, is just about the most effective way of ensuring good behaviour.
He is now saying a few more words and clearly understands more and more when we talk to him.
The best bit about this is opening the door when I get home from work, and hearing him shout ‘dad, dad, dad’. It’s a magical feeling and reminds me just how lucky I am.
Monday 10 May 2010
My new lifestyle
I’ve said before that having a child alters your lifestyle massively and last weekend summed up just how much my life has changed since Harry arrived.
In the past, a bank holiday weekend would have been based around trips to the pub, a nice meal out, and maybe a trip to the football. This time, my weekend included taking Harry to see his great, great Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, a trip to Chirk’s maypole dancing display, and a first birthday party.
Now if you’d have told me five years ago that’s how I would be spending my weekends, I doubt I’d have believed you. But do you know what? I loved every minute of it, mainly because I was able to spend so much time with Harry and, of course, because I got to show him off to family and friends.
Unfortunately, my ideas about ideal days out don’t always accord with Harry’s. This meant that during our visit to Ellesmere to see Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, I spent most of the time trying to stop Harry breaking various bits of furniture.
The maypole event was another challenge as Harry was determined to join in the dancing, which meant something of a battle during the performance. We managed somehow, though, and it was definitely worth it for the excellent home-made Welsh cakes we bought.
On Sunday Harry was invited to a party to celebrate a first birthday of one of his friends from playgroup, Austin. It was great fun (the food was fantastic – it’s been a while since I was able to have proper party food) and there was even a bouncy castle which, unfortunately, was a little on the small side for me. Harry enjoyed it though, and it was great to see him playing with the other children, even if I did have to intervene on a couple of occasions as he tried to wrestle toys off other children.
As we were recovering on Sunday night, Melissa said: “It’s going to be like this for the next 15 years, so you’d better get used to it.” I might just do that, you know.
In the past, a bank holiday weekend would have been based around trips to the pub, a nice meal out, and maybe a trip to the football. This time, my weekend included taking Harry to see his great, great Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, a trip to Chirk’s maypole dancing display, and a first birthday party.
Now if you’d have told me five years ago that’s how I would be spending my weekends, I doubt I’d have believed you. But do you know what? I loved every minute of it, mainly because I was able to spend so much time with Harry and, of course, because I got to show him off to family and friends.
Unfortunately, my ideas about ideal days out don’t always accord with Harry’s. This meant that during our visit to Ellesmere to see Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, I spent most of the time trying to stop Harry breaking various bits of furniture.
The maypole event was another challenge as Harry was determined to join in the dancing, which meant something of a battle during the performance. We managed somehow, though, and it was definitely worth it for the excellent home-made Welsh cakes we bought.
On Sunday Harry was invited to a party to celebrate a first birthday of one of his friends from playgroup, Austin. It was great fun (the food was fantastic – it’s been a while since I was able to have proper party food) and there was even a bouncy castle which, unfortunately, was a little on the small side for me. Harry enjoyed it though, and it was great to see him playing with the other children, even if I did have to intervene on a couple of occasions as he tried to wrestle toys off other children.
As we were recovering on Sunday night, Melissa said: “It’s going to be like this for the next 15 years, so you’d better get used to it.” I might just do that, you know.
Tuesday 4 May 2010
Food, glorious food
We’ve been lucky that Harry has been such a good eater since he started on solid food.
His appetite seemed to be endless and he was quite prepared to eat anything we put in front of him.
But as with all babies, things change very quickly and Harry has now decided there as some foods he just doesn’t like, which is making life a little bit, well, messy.
Generally, he will put the food into his mouth, but if he doesn’t like the taste or texture, he takes it out again and waves it around. Sometimes, if you’re unlucky or don’t move quickly enough, you get caught in the crossfire which means you can end up with food plastered across your face.
Harry’s chief dislikes when it comes to food at the moment are jelly, pasta, set custard and baked beans. These also happen to be among the messiest foods when he decides to start throwing them around the place.
Interestingly, this change in attitude to some foods has coincided with Harry wanting to play a more active role at meal times. When we let him have a spoon and a yoghurt, he is able to get at least some of the food into his mouth (although most of it still ends up on the highchair).
He also likes to share food now, which is another experience not to be missed. Harry will put some food into his own mouth before taking it out a moment later and trying to put it in your mouth instead.
Again, this can be a messy process as Harry’s coordination is not perfect and the food can just as easily end up in your ear as your mouth. And when it does end up in your mouth, it’s not always particularly pleasant having been chewed already.
Hopefully this is just another phase in his development that will pass fairly quickly – if only to save on all the washing.
His appetite seemed to be endless and he was quite prepared to eat anything we put in front of him.
But as with all babies, things change very quickly and Harry has now decided there as some foods he just doesn’t like, which is making life a little bit, well, messy.
Generally, he will put the food into his mouth, but if he doesn’t like the taste or texture, he takes it out again and waves it around. Sometimes, if you’re unlucky or don’t move quickly enough, you get caught in the crossfire which means you can end up with food plastered across your face.
Harry’s chief dislikes when it comes to food at the moment are jelly, pasta, set custard and baked beans. These also happen to be among the messiest foods when he decides to start throwing them around the place.
Interestingly, this change in attitude to some foods has coincided with Harry wanting to play a more active role at meal times. When we let him have a spoon and a yoghurt, he is able to get at least some of the food into his mouth (although most of it still ends up on the highchair).
He also likes to share food now, which is another experience not to be missed. Harry will put some food into his own mouth before taking it out a moment later and trying to put it in your mouth instead.
Again, this can be a messy process as Harry’s coordination is not perfect and the food can just as easily end up in your ear as your mouth. And when it does end up in your mouth, it’s not always particularly pleasant having been chewed already.
Hopefully this is just another phase in his development that will pass fairly quickly – if only to save on all the washing.
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