I’m happy to admit that I find it very difficult leaving Harry. I’ve got used to going to work, largely because I’ve managed to establish a routine that allows me to feed Harry his breakfast before I go, then bath him and put him to bed when I return home.
I also make an exception when it comes to Harry spending the odd night at his grandparents – it gives Melissa and I the chance to relax, not to mention the chance to have a bit of a lie-in. Even then, we’re always in a hurry to pick him up the following morning.
However, I spent last weekend on a stag night in Poland and it brought home to me just how precious my weekends are when it comes to spending time with Harry.
As best man, I simply had to go, and I’m not going to pretend I didn’t enjoy the chance to have a few beers and a catch up with my friends; after all, since Harry arrived, it’s not been a regular occurrence.
But I do look forward to my weekends enormously because I get to spend so much time with Harry. Melissa likes to hand responsibility for him over to me, and I can spend all day running round after him. What made it worse was on this occasion was the fact that Harry had been poorly last week, suffering from a bout of tonsillitis.
So you can imagine my horror when we arrived at Krakow Airport on Sunday morning, only to find that Liverpool Airport was closed. Initially we were told there would be no flights to Liverpool for a few days and the prospects for the rest of the UK were looking bleak. The thought of being away from Harry for a few more days was heartbreaking.
Eventually, we managed to find four seats on a flight to Bristol. My friends immediately said that I should have one of them, as I needed to get back to Harry. I was extremely relieved and grabbed the chance to get home with both hands. I did feel a bit guilty about leaving the others behind, though, particularly when I found out they weren’t going to get back until Tuesday.
We finally made it home just before midnight on Sunday, much to my relief. Of course, Harry was fast asleep, and it took a fair amount of self control not to pick him up and give him a cuddle. When I heard him crying in the night, though, I was in his room like a flash.
He seemed very pleased to see me when he woke the following morning and I was over the moon when he pointed at me and said ‘da da’. Let’s just say I’m looking forward to this weekend.
Wednesday, 26 May 2010
Friday, 14 May 2010
Tantrums and challenges
As I’ve said several times in this column, being a dad is a wonderful and incredibly rewarding experience.
With Harry now 15 months old, however, I’m starting to understand one of the major challenges of parenthood – dealing with tantrums.
This is Harry’s latest discovery. If he doesn’t get his own way, he collapses in a heap on the floor and screams.
Unfortunately this can happen at any time – and Harry isn’t fussy about where he chooses to have his tantrums. We’ve had them in supermarkets, in the street, in cafes, and so on. I’ll admit it can be quite embarrassing, and you always get the odd person looking at you as if to say ‘how could be so cruel to that little boy’.
The first time it happened, I was so surprised I didn’t quite know how to react. It was a textbook tantrum – lying down on the floor and shouting at the top of his voice. In fact, it was so unexpected, I almost laughed.
At the moment, the slightest setback can trigger one. At home, we’ve got safety blanks covering all of our plug sockets, which is just as well because one of Harry’s favourite pastimes is flicking the switches. Of course, it’s my job to keep him away from the plugs and, guess what, this results in tantrums galore.
It’s incredible how quickly these tantrums blow over, though. Within seconds of crying his heart out, he will be back on his feet again laughing. Harry clearly knows what he’s doing.
Melissa says it’s just a phase and, as she points out, we’ll soon be able to communicate with him better. By this, I take it she means we’ll soon be able to start bribing him which, if I remember my childhood correctly, is just about the most effective way of ensuring good behaviour.
He is now saying a few more words and clearly understands more and more when we talk to him.
The best bit about this is opening the door when I get home from work, and hearing him shout ‘dad, dad, dad’. It’s a magical feeling and reminds me just how lucky I am.
With Harry now 15 months old, however, I’m starting to understand one of the major challenges of parenthood – dealing with tantrums.
This is Harry’s latest discovery. If he doesn’t get his own way, he collapses in a heap on the floor and screams.
Unfortunately this can happen at any time – and Harry isn’t fussy about where he chooses to have his tantrums. We’ve had them in supermarkets, in the street, in cafes, and so on. I’ll admit it can be quite embarrassing, and you always get the odd person looking at you as if to say ‘how could be so cruel to that little boy’.
The first time it happened, I was so surprised I didn’t quite know how to react. It was a textbook tantrum – lying down on the floor and shouting at the top of his voice. In fact, it was so unexpected, I almost laughed.
At the moment, the slightest setback can trigger one. At home, we’ve got safety blanks covering all of our plug sockets, which is just as well because one of Harry’s favourite pastimes is flicking the switches. Of course, it’s my job to keep him away from the plugs and, guess what, this results in tantrums galore.
It’s incredible how quickly these tantrums blow over, though. Within seconds of crying his heart out, he will be back on his feet again laughing. Harry clearly knows what he’s doing.
Melissa says it’s just a phase and, as she points out, we’ll soon be able to communicate with him better. By this, I take it she means we’ll soon be able to start bribing him which, if I remember my childhood correctly, is just about the most effective way of ensuring good behaviour.
He is now saying a few more words and clearly understands more and more when we talk to him.
The best bit about this is opening the door when I get home from work, and hearing him shout ‘dad, dad, dad’. It’s a magical feeling and reminds me just how lucky I am.
Monday, 10 May 2010
My new lifestyle
I’ve said before that having a child alters your lifestyle massively and last weekend summed up just how much my life has changed since Harry arrived.
In the past, a bank holiday weekend would have been based around trips to the pub, a nice meal out, and maybe a trip to the football. This time, my weekend included taking Harry to see his great, great Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, a trip to Chirk’s maypole dancing display, and a first birthday party.
Now if you’d have told me five years ago that’s how I would be spending my weekends, I doubt I’d have believed you. But do you know what? I loved every minute of it, mainly because I was able to spend so much time with Harry and, of course, because I got to show him off to family and friends.
Unfortunately, my ideas about ideal days out don’t always accord with Harry’s. This meant that during our visit to Ellesmere to see Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, I spent most of the time trying to stop Harry breaking various bits of furniture.
The maypole event was another challenge as Harry was determined to join in the dancing, which meant something of a battle during the performance. We managed somehow, though, and it was definitely worth it for the excellent home-made Welsh cakes we bought.
On Sunday Harry was invited to a party to celebrate a first birthday of one of his friends from playgroup, Austin. It was great fun (the food was fantastic – it’s been a while since I was able to have proper party food) and there was even a bouncy castle which, unfortunately, was a little on the small side for me. Harry enjoyed it though, and it was great to see him playing with the other children, even if I did have to intervene on a couple of occasions as he tried to wrestle toys off other children.
As we were recovering on Sunday night, Melissa said: “It’s going to be like this for the next 15 years, so you’d better get used to it.” I might just do that, you know.
In the past, a bank holiday weekend would have been based around trips to the pub, a nice meal out, and maybe a trip to the football. This time, my weekend included taking Harry to see his great, great Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, a trip to Chirk’s maypole dancing display, and a first birthday party.
Now if you’d have told me five years ago that’s how I would be spending my weekends, I doubt I’d have believed you. But do you know what? I loved every minute of it, mainly because I was able to spend so much time with Harry and, of course, because I got to show him off to family and friends.
Unfortunately, my ideas about ideal days out don’t always accord with Harry’s. This meant that during our visit to Ellesmere to see Auntie Margaret and Uncle Charlie, I spent most of the time trying to stop Harry breaking various bits of furniture.
The maypole event was another challenge as Harry was determined to join in the dancing, which meant something of a battle during the performance. We managed somehow, though, and it was definitely worth it for the excellent home-made Welsh cakes we bought.
On Sunday Harry was invited to a party to celebrate a first birthday of one of his friends from playgroup, Austin. It was great fun (the food was fantastic – it’s been a while since I was able to have proper party food) and there was even a bouncy castle which, unfortunately, was a little on the small side for me. Harry enjoyed it though, and it was great to see him playing with the other children, even if I did have to intervene on a couple of occasions as he tried to wrestle toys off other children.
As we were recovering on Sunday night, Melissa said: “It’s going to be like this for the next 15 years, so you’d better get used to it.” I might just do that, you know.
Tuesday, 4 May 2010
Food, glorious food
We’ve been lucky that Harry has been such a good eater since he started on solid food.
His appetite seemed to be endless and he was quite prepared to eat anything we put in front of him.
But as with all babies, things change very quickly and Harry has now decided there as some foods he just doesn’t like, which is making life a little bit, well, messy.
Generally, he will put the food into his mouth, but if he doesn’t like the taste or texture, he takes it out again and waves it around. Sometimes, if you’re unlucky or don’t move quickly enough, you get caught in the crossfire which means you can end up with food plastered across your face.
Harry’s chief dislikes when it comes to food at the moment are jelly, pasta, set custard and baked beans. These also happen to be among the messiest foods when he decides to start throwing them around the place.
Interestingly, this change in attitude to some foods has coincided with Harry wanting to play a more active role at meal times. When we let him have a spoon and a yoghurt, he is able to get at least some of the food into his mouth (although most of it still ends up on the highchair).
He also likes to share food now, which is another experience not to be missed. Harry will put some food into his own mouth before taking it out a moment later and trying to put it in your mouth instead.
Again, this can be a messy process as Harry’s coordination is not perfect and the food can just as easily end up in your ear as your mouth. And when it does end up in your mouth, it’s not always particularly pleasant having been chewed already.
Hopefully this is just another phase in his development that will pass fairly quickly – if only to save on all the washing.
His appetite seemed to be endless and he was quite prepared to eat anything we put in front of him.
But as with all babies, things change very quickly and Harry has now decided there as some foods he just doesn’t like, which is making life a little bit, well, messy.
Generally, he will put the food into his mouth, but if he doesn’t like the taste or texture, he takes it out again and waves it around. Sometimes, if you’re unlucky or don’t move quickly enough, you get caught in the crossfire which means you can end up with food plastered across your face.
Harry’s chief dislikes when it comes to food at the moment are jelly, pasta, set custard and baked beans. These also happen to be among the messiest foods when he decides to start throwing them around the place.
Interestingly, this change in attitude to some foods has coincided with Harry wanting to play a more active role at meal times. When we let him have a spoon and a yoghurt, he is able to get at least some of the food into his mouth (although most of it still ends up on the highchair).
He also likes to share food now, which is another experience not to be missed. Harry will put some food into his own mouth before taking it out a moment later and trying to put it in your mouth instead.
Again, this can be a messy process as Harry’s coordination is not perfect and the food can just as easily end up in your ear as your mouth. And when it does end up in your mouth, it’s not always particularly pleasant having been chewed already.
Hopefully this is just another phase in his development that will pass fairly quickly – if only to save on all the washing.
Friday, 23 April 2010
Smile
The pace of Harry’s development continues to amaze me. It’s only a couple of months since he started to walk but he’s now very confident on his feet and will dash about the place at surprising speed.
His latest trick is climbing. Melissa says he’s seen other children doing this at playgroup and is simply copying them; whatever, he’s certainly a quick learner.
The other day Harry and I were playing in the conservatory when Harry decided to throw his bottle of juice across the room. I went to pick it up and as soon as I turned my back, Harry climbed on to the coffee table and sat, cross-legged, grinning like a Cheshire cat and clearly very proud of what he’d done.
I snatched him off the table as quickly as I could but every time he gets an opportunity, he starts lifting his little leg to climb on anything and everything. One thing’s for sure, babysitting Harry is an energetic pastime.
And that’s not the only thing causing heart failure for us this week. Harry is now tall enough – just – to reach door handles so he can let himself out of rooms.
I thought this was still a few months off but a week or so ago I changed Harry’s nappy in the bathroom upstairs and was just putting the cream and dirty nappy away with my back to Harry. Moments later, I heard the door handle go and thought it was Melissa – so I was pretty shocked to see Harry disappearing off down the landing laughing to himself.
His character is really starting to shine through now – he knows when he’s done something wrong and will try and charm you with a smile when you tell him off.
He also flashes a smile when he’s succeeded in doing something he knows he shouldn’t, and he also looks at you and grins while trying to sidle up to something he knows he’s not allowed to touch.
And while keeping up with Harry may sometimes be a bit of challenge, it’s still the most rewarding experience of my life.
His latest trick is climbing. Melissa says he’s seen other children doing this at playgroup and is simply copying them; whatever, he’s certainly a quick learner.
The other day Harry and I were playing in the conservatory when Harry decided to throw his bottle of juice across the room. I went to pick it up and as soon as I turned my back, Harry climbed on to the coffee table and sat, cross-legged, grinning like a Cheshire cat and clearly very proud of what he’d done.
I snatched him off the table as quickly as I could but every time he gets an opportunity, he starts lifting his little leg to climb on anything and everything. One thing’s for sure, babysitting Harry is an energetic pastime.
And that’s not the only thing causing heart failure for us this week. Harry is now tall enough – just – to reach door handles so he can let himself out of rooms.
I thought this was still a few months off but a week or so ago I changed Harry’s nappy in the bathroom upstairs and was just putting the cream and dirty nappy away with my back to Harry. Moments later, I heard the door handle go and thought it was Melissa – so I was pretty shocked to see Harry disappearing off down the landing laughing to himself.
His character is really starting to shine through now – he knows when he’s done something wrong and will try and charm you with a smile when you tell him off.
He also flashes a smile when he’s succeeded in doing something he knows he shouldn’t, and he also looks at you and grins while trying to sidle up to something he knows he’s not allowed to touch.
And while keeping up with Harry may sometimes be a bit of challenge, it’s still the most rewarding experience of my life.
Tuesday, 20 April 2010
Ty Mawr revelation
We all like to moan about the council – the roads have got too many pot holes, our council tax is too high, and so on and so on.
Normally, I’m no different but, for a change, I’m going to say something good about Wrexham County Council.
So what’s the reason for this sudden change of attitude? Simple, I visited Ty Mawr Country Park on Sunday – and was bowled over.
For those of you that haven’t visited this fantastic facility in Cefn Mawr, it’s a superbly maintained park that has lovely walks, picnic areas, and play areas, as well as various animals, all in the shadow of the impressive Cefn Viaduct, (which I now know was built in 1848 by Thomas Brassey).
Best of all, there’s no entry fee – although you can make a donation to help with the upkeep of the park – which makes it ideal if you’re looking for an inexpensive way to spend an afternoon.
I’d driven past the entrance on numerous occasions, but I’d never actually visited the park. However, with the weather glorious, Melissa decided it would be the perfect spot for a picnic with Harry.
In fact the only problem was keeping Harry still while we ate our lunch – he was more interested in toddling off to see the animals. He was particularly taken with Hovis, a very large rabbit, and a turkey, whose name escapes me.
Then there were the guinea pigs, goats, sheep and donkeys. Harry was able to pat one of the donkeys but, once he started patting, he didn’t want to stop, which resulted in a tantrum that threatened to shatter a very peaceful afternoon.
Fortunately, with so much to see, the tantrum didn’t last long and Harry was soon smiling again.
It was a perfect way to spend a sunny spring afternoon and, given that Ty Mawr is only a couple of minutes from our front door, I’m sure we’ll be back again very soon.
Normally, I’m no different but, for a change, I’m going to say something good about Wrexham County Council.
So what’s the reason for this sudden change of attitude? Simple, I visited Ty Mawr Country Park on Sunday – and was bowled over.
For those of you that haven’t visited this fantastic facility in Cefn Mawr, it’s a superbly maintained park that has lovely walks, picnic areas, and play areas, as well as various animals, all in the shadow of the impressive Cefn Viaduct, (which I now know was built in 1848 by Thomas Brassey).
Best of all, there’s no entry fee – although you can make a donation to help with the upkeep of the park – which makes it ideal if you’re looking for an inexpensive way to spend an afternoon.
I’d driven past the entrance on numerous occasions, but I’d never actually visited the park. However, with the weather glorious, Melissa decided it would be the perfect spot for a picnic with Harry.
In fact the only problem was keeping Harry still while we ate our lunch – he was more interested in toddling off to see the animals. He was particularly taken with Hovis, a very large rabbit, and a turkey, whose name escapes me.
Then there were the guinea pigs, goats, sheep and donkeys. Harry was able to pat one of the donkeys but, once he started patting, he didn’t want to stop, which resulted in a tantrum that threatened to shatter a very peaceful afternoon.
Fortunately, with so much to see, the tantrum didn’t last long and Harry was soon smiling again.
It was a perfect way to spend a sunny spring afternoon and, given that Ty Mawr is only a couple of minutes from our front door, I’m sure we’ll be back again very soon.
Friday, 9 April 2010
Early mornings...
One thing’s for sure, you certainly get good value from your weekends when you’ve got a little one. Before we had Harry, our weekends were a chance to catch up on sleep after a long week at work.
I’m not talking about staying in bed all day, but being able to sleep until 9am was taken for granted.
Nowadays, sleeping until seven is a bonus. Over the Easter weekend, Harry was up at six every day – which meant we were downstairs having breakfast by quarter past. Unlike me, however, Harry is full of beans at that time of the day.
So on Saturday morning, while I was nursing a cup of tea and feeling sorry for myself, Harry was shouting at me to make a jigsaw with him. Believe me, it takes quite a lot of effort to get down on all fours and play at that time of day.
But getting up that early does have its advantages. For a start, the day is a lot longer.
We were out and about by half past eight, which is great if you need to go shopping – everywhere is, understandably, nice and quiet at that time of the morning (except, of course, for other parents who have been woken up at an unsuitable hour).
Another advantage is it encourages you to drink less alcohol; the thought of being woken up at six in the morning after one-too-many the night before does not appeal. While this can be a bit depressing, especially over a bank holiday weekend, I’m sure my liver is very grateful.
Finally, it also means I get to spend plenty of time with Harry – being up at six gives me a good 12 hours to play with him. The only thing is, we’re both ready for bed by seven in the evening.
I’m not talking about staying in bed all day, but being able to sleep until 9am was taken for granted.
Nowadays, sleeping until seven is a bonus. Over the Easter weekend, Harry was up at six every day – which meant we were downstairs having breakfast by quarter past. Unlike me, however, Harry is full of beans at that time of the day.
So on Saturday morning, while I was nursing a cup of tea and feeling sorry for myself, Harry was shouting at me to make a jigsaw with him. Believe me, it takes quite a lot of effort to get down on all fours and play at that time of day.
But getting up that early does have its advantages. For a start, the day is a lot longer.
We were out and about by half past eight, which is great if you need to go shopping – everywhere is, understandably, nice and quiet at that time of the morning (except, of course, for other parents who have been woken up at an unsuitable hour).
Another advantage is it encourages you to drink less alcohol; the thought of being woken up at six in the morning after one-too-many the night before does not appeal. While this can be a bit depressing, especially over a bank holiday weekend, I’m sure my liver is very grateful.
Finally, it also means I get to spend plenty of time with Harry – being up at six gives me a good 12 hours to play with him. The only thing is, we’re both ready for bed by seven in the evening.
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